Grief & Loss · Hypnosis session
The Death of a Partner, and the Quiet That Comes After
Their keys are still in the bowl by the door. You make two cups of tea and pour one away. After the death of a partner, the house goes quiet in a particular way, and the days fill with forms, phone calls and people being kind.
This page is for the months after losing a husband, wife or partner: what grief usually does, free things that help, and a twenty-four-minute guided recording that gives you a regular, quiet time to rest. First, one thing.
If you are not sure you want to be hereGrief can bring thoughts of not wanting to go on. If that is you, please talk to someone tonight.
- Lifeline, 13 11 14, or text 0477 13 11 14. Any hour, every day.
- Suicide Call Back Service, 1300 659 467.
- In immediate danger, call 000.
- MensLine Australia, 1300 78 99 78: free counselling for men, 24/7.
- 13YARN, 13 92 76: 24/7, run by Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people.
- For grief rather than crisis: Griefline (now part of SANE Australia), 1300 845 745, Monday to Friday, 10am to 8pm AEST/AEDT, plus 24/7 online forums for over-18s. Grief Australia, 1800 642 066, offers free counselling to Victorians. Neither is a crisis line.
If grief is still intense and getting in the way of daily life after many months, see your GP. healthdirect suggests help when grief “has been distressing for 12 months or more”. Grief-specific therapy has good trial evidence for people who feel stuck.
Death Of A Partner
Twenty-four minutes of guided rest for someone whose partner has died, giving the day a quiet, regular break from grief, which one widely used model of grieving treats as part of coping.
US$18.95one-off · no subscription · about A$27
I earn a commission if you buy through this page. It doesn’t change what you pay, and it doesn’t decide what I recommend.
Checkout opens on hypnosisdownloads.com in a new tab. Priced in US dollars; some cards add a foreign-transaction fee. Ninety days to change your mind, nothing to justify.
Chosen by Ernest McLeodClinical hypnotherapist. An Adelaide practice, seeing clients across Australia by video. Fourteen years in practice. About Ernest →
Can a recording be as good as sitting with someone?
For pain, the research says it can. The largest recent review of hypnosis for pain (Yim and Derbyshire, 2026) compared how it was delivered and found no meaningful difference between a live clinician, a recording and self-hypnosis. That research was on pain, not on grief, but it’s the best evidence there is that a recording isn’t a second-rate version of sitting in a room with someone.
What it can’t be is company. That still matters.
Which of these are part of your days now?
- Forms with a box for “the deceased”, and envelopes still in their name
- Their side of the bed stays made, or you have moved to the couch
- You ring their voicemail to hear their voice
- You set out two plates, or buy the food only they ate
- You wake at the hour they used to get home
If you lost a parent, a friend or a pet, the grief guide below fits better.
What happens after the death of a partner?
A mix of things, in no set order. Grief comes in waves, as healthdirect puts it, “seeming to fade in intensity for a while before coming back.” Sleep often breaks up. Some days are numb, some are ordinary, and neither is wrong.
Losing a partner also brings second losses: the person who did the tax, who you would have rung about all of this.
How long does grief last after the death of a partner?
There is no timetable. healthdirect says the intensity eases over time for most people, that everyone grieves differently, and that many carry some sadness always. Moving on, in its words, “doesn’t mean that your grief will end, but instead that you will learn to live with it.”
One study followed 301 older Americans for up to four years after a husband or wife died (Galatzer-Levy and Bonanno, 2012). About two in three, 66.3%, showed little or no depression throughout. About one in ten, 9.1%, had grief-related depression that had eased by four years. The rest had been depressed before the death, and either stayed so (14.5%) or improved after it (10.1%).
It measured depression, not grief, and being in the one in ten doesn’t mean anyone grieved wrongly.
Can grief affect your physical health?
A little, mostly in the first months: a reason to look after yourself, not to be frightened. Large studies of widowed people find a small rise in health risks, strongest in the first six months and more marked in men (Moon and colleagues, 2011, 15 studies).
To give it a size: of 30,447 people in the UK aged 60 to 89 whose partner had died, 50 had a heart attack or stroke in the next 30 days. That is 0.16%, fewer than 2 in 1,000, against 0.08% of people the same age whose partner was alive. The extra risk faded after the first month (Carey and colleagues, 2014).
See your GP in the first monthsNot because something is wrong, but so your GP knows what has happened. Keep taking your own medicines, eat at mealtimes, and rest when you can.
My husband passed away. What should I do now?
Very little, today. The practical side is real: the funeral, the bank, the forms, the calls, often at once. Not all of it is urgent, and none of it has to be done alone. A trusted person, or your GP, can help you work out where to start.
For yourself, healthdirect’s list is plain: some regular exercise, healthy food, enough sleep, alcohol drunk responsibly, no recreational drugs.
How can I cope with the sudden death of my spouse?
Gently, and in turns. Stroebe and Schut’s Dual Process Model, a widely used account of grief, describes people moving between facing the loss and dealing with the life left, with time off from both. If the death was sudden, tell your GP early: the American Psychiatric Association lists sudden and unnatural deaths among those where grief more often stays intense.
Death Of A PartnerUS$18.95 · instant download · full refund within 90 days if it isn’t right.
Opens the publisher’s checkout in a new tab. Or keep reading — the free techniques below cost nothing.
What can you do for yourself that costs nothing?
Four things, drawn from grief research and healthdirect’s advice: time off from grief, looking after your body, letting people help with the practical side, and planning for the hard dates. The recording below is a good place to practise the first.
- Take time off from grief, on purpose
Fifteen or twenty minutes a day on something that takes your full attention: the same walk, a garden bed, a crossword. Keep to a set time each day. The model above counts this rest as part of grieving.
- Put your body first for a while
Eat at mealtimes, even a little. Keep taking your medicines. Go to bed and get up at roughly the same times. Go easy on alcohol in the quiet evenings. And make that GP appointment.
- Give one person one job
People want to help and don’t know how. Give one of them a task: the calls to the bank, Thursday’s meal, the car. You needn’t talk your feelings through with them; the company counts even when you say little.
- Mark the hard dates before they arrive
healthdirect notes that birthdays, anniversaries and holidays can trigger intense grief. Put their birthday, your anniversary and the first Christmas in the calendar now, and decide who you will be with.
What is in the Death Of A Partner session?
Twenty-four minutes, narrated by Mark Tyrrell. The publisher describes rest from grieving, with some encouragement about the future, and says resting is not disloyal. It gives the first free step above a fixed place: same chair, same time, headphones on.
Death Of A Partner
US$18.95About A$27 · one-off, no subscription.
- 24 minutes 22 seconds, narrated by Mark Tyrrell of Uncommon Knowledge
- Instant MP3 download plus the publisher’s app, unlimited listens
- A guided rest from grief, not a treatment for it
- For someone whose partner has died and who is not in crisis
Opens the publisher’s secure checkout · no account needed
Will listening stir everything up?
Nothing in the publisher’s description suggests so: it describes rest from grieving, with some encouragement about the future. You hear every word and can stop at any point. If tears come, that is allowed. Don’t listen while driving, and ask your doctor first if you have epilepsy.
The publisher reports trading since 1998 and 334 purchases of this title. Self-reported, and a count of purchases, not results.
What does the research say about hypnosis and grief?
Hypnosis for grief has barely been studied, and a recording for grief not at all. The only randomised trial is Çınaroğlu and colleagues’ 2026 study of 39 Turkish university students with prolonged grief symptoms, given in-person Ericksonian hypnotherapy, CBT or a waiting list. Both therapies did better than waiting. It has not been replicated.
About 13 people a group, against a waiting list rather than an equally attentive comparison, and the full paper is paywalled, so its effect sizes couldn’t be checked. The abstract doesn’t say what loss the students had, nobody used a recording, and so nothing shows this session changes grief. What it offers is a guided rest, which the model above counts as part of grieving.
Where proper help comes inMost people’s grief doesn’t need treatment. Currier and colleagues pooled 61 controlled studies in 2008: support offered to all bereaved people showed no clear lasting benefit, partly because people tended to improve anyway. Help aimed at those who were struggling compared well with therapy for other problems.
Grief that stays intense and disabling long after the loss may be prolonged grief disorder, which only a health professional can diagnose. The APA estimates 4% to 15% of bereaved adults, more often after losing a partner. It responds to specific therapy: in Shear’s 2016 trial of 395 people with complicated grief, 82.5% responded to complicated grief treatment plus a placebo pill, against 54.8% given the placebo with grief monitoring and encouragement.
Who is this session wrong for?
Anyone who needs something other than a recording first, and there is no shame in that. If one of the lines below describes you, see your GP before anything else, or ring one of the numbers at the top of this page. The session will still be here.
- You have had thoughts of not wanting to be here.
- Grief is still intense and getting in the way of daily life after many months.
- Your partner died suddenly, violently or by suicide, and no GP knows yet.
- You are drinking more to get through the evenings.
- You want something to make the grief stop. This recording doesn’t try.
- You would be listening in the car.
If tonight is hard, the lines below are open now.
Free and confidential, open now. Tap to call.
Common questions after the death of a partner
Is it normal to feel relief after a partner dies?
Yes, especially after a long illness. In a 2003 study of 217 family carers of people with dementia, 72% said the death was a relief to them, and more than 90% believed it was a relief to the person who died. Relief sits alongside grief, and it isn’t a betrayal.
Do I have to talk about it to grieve properly?
No. A 2005 review by Stroebe and colleagues found no evidence that talking feelings through helps ordinary grief along. Some people talk a great deal and some grieve quietly, and both can do well. Being cut off from people is different: the APA lists lack of support as a risk.
Is it wrong to take a break from grieving?
No. Stroebe and Schut’s Dual Process Model, a widely used account of grief, treats taking respite from grieving as part of coping. A laugh at the television doesn’t mean you have stopped caring. Moving between grief and ordinary life is what grieving usually looks like.
When should I see a GP about grief?
In the first months, so your GP knows what has happened. After that, healthdirect suggests seeking help if sadness and despair persist, if grief has been distressing for 12 months or more, or if it is getting in the way of everyday life. Thoughts of harming yourself mean ringing Lifeline on 13 11 14 now.
Does hypnosis help with grief?
Hypnosis can offer a guided, structured time to rest, which fits one widely used model of healthy grieving. Whether it changes grief has barely been tested: the only randomised trial, in 2026, had 39 university students in Turkey, used in-person hypnotherapy against a waiting list, and has not been replicated. No recording has been tested for grief.
What if the session isn’t right for me?
Email the publisher your order number within 90 days and they will refund you in full, no questions asked, one order per customer. It is a small, private thing to try, and easy to undo if the timing or the voice isn’t right.
Other pages that may fit better
- Coping with griefThe wider guide, including a session for the funeral
- Anticipatory griefIf your partner is still alive, very ill, and the grieving has begun
- Waking in the nightIf the hardest hour is three in the morning and sleep won’t come back
Where these numbers come from
- Yim TH, Derbyshire SWG. A systematic review of hypnosis for clinical pain relief. Eur J Pain. 2026;30(8):e70369. doi:10.1002/ejp.70369
- healthdirect Australia. Grief and loss [Internet]. Canberra: healthdirect Australia; last reviewed 2026 Feb [cited 2026 Sep 25]. healthdirect.gov.au
- Galatzer-Levy IR, Bonanno GA. Beyond normality in the study of bereavement: heterogeneity in depression outcomes following loss in older adults. Soc Sci Med. 2012;74(12):1987-94. doi:10.1016/j.socscimed.2012.02.022
- Moon JR, Kondo N, Glymour MM, Subramanian SV. Widowhood and mortality: a meta-analysis. PLoS One. 2011;6(8):e23465. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0023465
- Carey IM, Shah SM, DeWilde S, Harris T, Victor CR, Cook DG. Increased risk of acute cardiovascular events after partner bereavement: a matched cohort study. JAMA Intern Med. 2014;174(4):598-605. doi:10.1001/jamainternmed.2013.14558
- Stroebe M, Schut H. The dual process model of coping with bereavement: rationale and description. Death Stud. 1999;23(3):197-224. doi:10.1080/074811899201046
- American Psychiatric Association. Prolonged grief disorder [Internet]. Washington (DC): APA; 2025 Aug [cited 2026 Sep 25]. psychiatry.org
- Stroebe W, Schut H, Stroebe MS. Grief work, disclosure and counseling: do they help the bereaved? Clin Psychol Rev. 2005;25(4):395-414. doi:10.1016/j.cpr.2005.01.004
- Çınaroğlu M, Yılmazer E, Ülker SV, Çinar F. Effects of Ericksonian hypnotherapy versus cognitive behavioral therapy on prolonged grief among university students: a randomized clinical trial. Int J Clin Exp Hypn. 2026;74(1):93-120. doi:10.1080/00207144.2025.2464747
- Currier JM, Neimeyer RA, Berman JS. The effectiveness of psychotherapeutic interventions for bereaved persons: a comprehensive quantitative review. Psychol Bull. 2008;134(5):648-61. doi:10.1037/0033-2909.134.5.648
- Shear MK, Reynolds CF 3rd, Simon NM, Zisook S, Wang Y, Mauro C, et al. Optimizing treatment of complicated grief: a randomized clinical trial. JAMA Psychiatry. 2016;73(7):685-94. doi:10.1001/jamapsychiatry.2016.0892
- Schulz R, Mendelsohn AB, Haley WE, Mahoney D, Allen RS, Zhang S, et al. End-of-life care and the effects of bereavement on family caregivers of persons with dementia. N Engl J Med. 2003;349(20):1936-42. doi:10.1056/NEJMsa035373
Ernest McLeod — clinical hypnotherapist. An Adelaide practice, seeing clients across Australia by video. Fourteen years in practice.
- ICHP
- FELLOW, ASCH
- IICT MEMBER
For someone whose partner has died, the helplines go above the price and the sale stays quiet. More →
Twenty-four minutes of rest, when you want them
Start with the free things: the GP visit, the time off, one job handed on. For a set time each day to rest, the session is here, refundable for ninety days.
US$18.95Instant download · 90-day refund · about A$27
Results vary from person to person, and hypnosis does not replace medical care or treatment. This is a self-help audio session, not counselling or a substitute for professional care. If you have thoughts of not wanting to be here, ring Lifeline on 13 11 14 or the Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467. In immediate danger, call 000.