Grief & Loss · Hypnosis session
Losing a Parent: When Their Number Is Still in Your Phone
You go to ring them with some small news, and your thumb is on their name before you remember. Losing a parent as an adult is often treated as the natural order of things, which leaves little room to grieve. Below are four gentle things to try, and a recording for a quiet, regular rest.
If grief has turned into not wanting to be herePlease talk to someone now, before reading on.
- Lifeline: 13 11 14, or text 0477 13 11 14. Open 24/7.
- Suicide Call Back Service: 1300 659 467.
- In immediate danger, call 000.
- MensLine Australia, 1300 78 99 78, 24/7. 13YARN, 13 92 76, 24/7, for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people.
- Griefline, now part of SANE Australia: 1300 845 745, Monday to Friday, 10am to 8pm AEST/AEDT; grief support, not a crisis line. Grief Australia, 1800 642 066: free bereavement counselling for Victorians, no crisis service.
If many months on the grief is still intense and getting in the way of daily life, see your GP.
“I’d choose this for the evenings after a mum or dad has died, when you need twenty-six quiet minutes that ask nothing of you. It won’t shorten grief or make it tidy. There’s a free sample, and ninety days to change your mind.”
Dealing with the Death of a Parent
US$18.95one-off · no subscription · about A$27
I earn a commission if you buy through this page. It doesn’t change what you pay, and it doesn’t decide what I recommend.
Ninety days to change your mind, nothing to justify. Checkout opens on hypnosisdownloads.com in a new tab; priced in US dollars, and some cards add a foreign-transaction fee.
Which of these are true for you at the moment?
- Their voice is on an old voicemail, and you can’t bring yourself to delete it
- Their handwriting on an old shopping list stopped you halfway through a drawer
- People asked their age, as if the answer decided how sad you should be
- The paperwork, the house and the phone calls have kept you busy, and you have barely cried
- The smell of their soap, somewhere unexpected, and you had to leave the room
If some of these are yours, read on. If it’s the fourth, see the section on relief below.
What is in the Dealing with the Death of a Parent session?
A single guided session of about twenty-six minutes, narrated by Roger Elliott, for repeated listening. The publisher describes it as for people coping with a parent’s death, with room given to honouring your relationship with them. It is a quiet, structured time to lie down and rest, with nothing to organise.
The largest recent review of hypnosis for pain (Yim and Derbyshire, 2026) compared how it was delivered and found no meaningful difference between a live clinician, a recording and self-hypnosis. That research was on pain, not on grief, but it’s the best evidence there is that a recording isn’t a second-rate version of sitting in a room with someone. There is a free sample on the publisher’s page.
Why is losing a parent so hard?
Partly because of who they were to you, and partly because the world tends to treat it as expected. Researchers in 2026 described losing a parent in midlife as often viewed as a normal transition, yet socially under-recognised despite its psychological impact.
A US national study of 8,865 adults by Marks and colleagues found a father’s death hit sons harder and a mother’s death hit daughters harder, and for men it showed more in physical health. In Finland, Luukkonen and colleagues followed everyone aged 35 to 55: psychotropic medication purchases rose in the year before and after a parent died.
The rise was strongest among women and people with few or no siblings: 6.8 percentage points for women with no siblings after a mother’s death, compared with women whose mother was alive. If you are an only child, tell your GP.
Does it matter whether other people acknowledge it?
In one 2026 study, yes. Baruch and colleagues surveyed 423 Israelis in midlife whose parent had died. The more their loss was recognised by others, the more they had integrated it, and the more integrated, the less intense their grief. A single survey: a link, not proof of cause.
Dealing with the Death of a ParentUS$18.95 · instant download · full refund within 90 days if it isn’t right.
Opens the publisher’s checkout in a new tab. Or keep reading — the free techniques below cost nothing.
Is it normal not to cry, or to feel relief?
Yes, both. The Yale Bereavement Study followed 233 people after a family member’s death. Acceptance was the most commonly reported response from the first month, and longing, not disbelief, the strongest painful feeling. Getting on with things isn’t the same as not caring.
Relief is common too, especially after a long illness. In Schulz and colleagues’ 2003 study of 217 family carers of people with dementia, 72% said the death was a relief to them. If you nursed a parent through a long decline, relief is not a betrayal.
How do you survive the loss of a parent?
One day at a time, and not by any rule. Most people gradually find their footing on their own, and you don’t have to talk it all out to get there. Four free things, in the order I’d try them.
- Take a break from grief, on purpose
Stroebe and Schut’s widely used Dual Process Model describes grieving people moving between facing the loss and dealing with what it changed, and counts respite from both as part of coping. A break is not forgetting them. The recording is a good place to practise this one.
- Let one or two people know, plainly
A manager, a neighbour, a friend who missed the funeral. “My dad died in June. You’re welcome to ask me about him.” That is the recognition the midlife study linked to less intense grief.
- Book a GP appointment for yourself, not just for the paperwork
Tell them what has happened. healthdirect’s advice for anyone grieving is exercise, healthy food, enough sleep and alcohol in moderation. Men in the Marks study showed it more in physical health, so if you are a man who is ‘fine’, go anyway.
- Mark the dates before they arrive
healthdirect notes that birthdays, anniversaries and holidays can bring on intense grief. Decide a week ahead what you will do with their birthday, Mother’s or Father’s Day, or the first Christmas, even if the plan is small.
Dealing with the Death of a Parent
US$18.95About A$27 · one-off, no subscription.
- 26 minutes 20 seconds, narrated by Roger Elliott of Uncommon Knowledge
- An instant MP3 download, yours to replay as often as you need
- A free sample on the publisher’s page
- For grief after a parent’s death, not for thoughts of not wanting to be here
Opens the publisher’s secure checkout · no account needed
Will the pain of losing a parent ever go away?
For most people it eases, though not on a schedule, and not always completely. healthdirect says that after losing a loved one you may always carry some sadness and miss them, and that most people find meaning and pleasure again. Moving on, in its words, doesn’t mean grief ends; it means learning to live with it.
When grief stays stuckFor some people, intense grief that doesn’t ease is a recognised condition, prolonged grief disorder, which only a health professional can diagnose. A 2017 meta-analysis by Lundorff and colleagues put it at about 1 in 10 adults after a non-violent death.
In Shear and colleagues’ 2016 trial of 395 people, 82.5% responded to complicated grief treatment plus a placebo pill, against 54.8% given the placebo with grief monitoring and encouragement. Your GP can refer you for up to 10 Medicare-subsidised sessions a year under Better Access.
What has and hasn’t been studied?
Very little. Across every kind of grief there is one small randomised trial of hypnosis: Çınaroğlu and colleagues, 2026, with 39 university students in Turkey who had symptoms of prolonged grief. Face-to-face Ericksonian hypnotherapy, CBT and a waiting list were compared, and both therapies did better than waiting.
That is about 13 people per group, a waiting-list comparison, and in-person sessions, not a recording. The abstract doesn’t say what kind of loss the students had, the full paper is paywalled so its effect sizes couldn’t be checked, and it hasn’t been replicated. No one has tested a hypnosis recording for grief. So this recording isn’t a treatment for grief. It is the first free step above, in a form you can lie down and play.
Will you be in control while you listen?
Yes. You stay aware, hear every word and can switch it off at any point; it feels more like being absorbed in a book than being asleep. Never listen while driving, and check with your doctor first if you have epilepsy.
The publisher reports 573 purchases of Dealing with the Death of a Parent.
Their own count, and a count of purchases, not of outcomes.
Who is this session wrong for?
For most people after a parent’s death, a quiet recording is a reasonable small thing to have beside the free steps. For the people below, something else should come first. It is simply the order I would put things in.
- You have had thoughts of not wanting to be here. Ring Lifeline on 13 11 14 today.
- Your parent died suddenly or violently. The American Psychiatric Association lists that as raising the risk of prolonged grief, so see a GP early.
- Many months on, grief is still stopping you working, sleeping or eating, or you rely on alcohol to get through evenings. Start with your GP.
- You want it to end the grief or give you closure. It won’t, and it isn’t built to.
If tonight is hard, the lines below are open now.
Free and confidential, open now. Tap to call.
Common questions about losing a parent
What should you say to someone who has just lost a parent?
Say you’re sorry, and ask what their mum or dad was like. Don’t measure the loss by the parent’s age. In a 2026 study of 423 adults in midlife, having the loss recognised by others went with less intense grief.
Are there stages of grief after a parent dies?
Not fixed ones. The five stages came from observing dying patients, not bereaved families, and a 2017 review found no sound evidence for them. In a study of 233 bereaved people, acceptance was common from the start, and longing, not denial, was the strongest painful feeling. Feelings come and go, often in waves.
Why do I feel worse months after my parent died?
It isn’t unusual. healthdirect notes grief can come in waves, fading for a while before coming back, and that birthdays and anniversaries can bring it on. The first weeks are often full of arrangements, which leaves less room to feel it. None of this means you are going backwards.
When should I see a doctor about grief?
healthdirect suggests seeing someone if grief has been distressing for 12 months or more, if it gets in the way of work, relationships or sleep, or if sadness and despair persist. Sooner if you have thoughts of harming yourself. Only a health professional can diagnose prolonged grief disorder, and grief-specific therapy has good trial evidence.
What age is hardest to lose a parent?
Research can’t rank one loss against another, but timing shapes the effects. In a US study of 11,877 people, a recent death of either parent went with more depressive symptoms, while a mother’s death in childhood or a father’s in young adulthood went with longer-term effects on mental health.
Can hypnosis help with grief after losing a parent?
What a recording offers is a regular, guided time to rest, which one widely used model of grief counts as part of coping. Whether hypnosis changes grief hasn’t been tested beyond one small trial of 39 students given in-person hypnotherapy, CBT or a waiting list. No recording has been trialled. It is not a treatment for grief.
Where these numbers come from
- Baruch L, Ohayon S, Yehene E. Beyond “normative” loss: social context, loss integration, and adaptation to parental bereavement in midlife. BMC Psychol. 2026;14(1):1144. doi:10.1186/s40359-026-04879-7
- Marks NF, Jun H, Song J. Death of parents and adult psychological and physical well-being: a prospective U.S. national study. J Fam Issues. 2007;28(12):1611-38. doi:10.1177/0192513X07302728
- Luukkonen J, Pitkänen J, Junna L, Bister L, Martikainen P, Laakso SP, et al. Number of siblings and psychotropic medication purchases surrounding parental death in adulthood: a population-wide cohort study in Finland. J Epidemiol Community Health. 2026;80(7):519-25. doi:10.1136/jech-2025-224775
- Kamis C, Stolte A, Copeland M. Parental death and mid-adulthood depressive symptoms: the importance of life course stage and parent’s gender. J Health Soc Behav. 2022;63(2):250-65. doi:10.1177/00221465211061120
- Maciejewski PK, Zhang B, Block SD, Prigerson HG. An empirical examination of the stage theory of grief. JAMA. 2007;297(7):716-23. doi:10.1001/jama.297.7.716
- Stroebe M, Schut H, Boerner K. Cautioning health-care professionals: bereaved persons are misguided through the stages of grief. Omega (Westport). 2017;74(4):455-73. doi:10.1177/0030222817691870
- Schulz R, Mendelsohn AB, Haley WE, Mahoney D, Allen RS, Zhang S, et al. End-of-life care and the effects of bereavement on family caregivers of persons with dementia. N Engl J Med. 2003;349(20):1936-42. doi:10.1056/NEJMsa035373
- Stroebe M, Schut H. The dual process model of coping with bereavement: rationale and description. Death Stud. 1999;23(3):197-224. doi:10.1080/074811899201046
- Lundorff M, Holmgren H, Zachariae R, Farver-Vestergaard I, O’Connor M. Prevalence of prolonged grief disorder in adult bereavement: a systematic review and meta-analysis. J Affect Disord. 2017;212:138-49. doi:10.1016/j.jad.2017.01.030
- Shear MK, Reynolds CF 3rd, Simon NM, Zisook S, Wang Y, Mauro C, et al. Optimizing treatment of complicated grief: a randomized clinical trial. JAMA Psychiatry. 2016;73(7):685-94. doi:10.1001/jamapsychiatry.2016.0892
- Çınaroğlu M, Yılmazer E, Ülker SV, Çinar F. Effects of Ericksonian hypnotherapy versus cognitive behavioral therapy on prolonged grief among university students: a randomized clinical trial. Int J Clin Exp Hypn. 2026;74(1):93-120. doi:10.1080/00207144.2025.2464747
- Yim TH, Derbyshire SWG. A systematic review of hypnosis for clinical pain relief. Eur J Pain. 2026;30(8):e70369. doi:10.1002/ejp.70369
- healthdirect. Grief and loss [Internet]. Last reviewed February 2026 [cited 2026 Sep 25]. healthdirect.gov.au
- American Psychiatric Association. Prolonged grief disorder [Internet]. August 2025 [cited 2026 Sep 25]. psychiatry.org
- Griefline (SANE Australia). Telephone support [Internet]. [cited 2026 Sep 25]. griefline.org.au
- Grief Australia. Contact [Internet]. [cited 2026 Sep 25]. grief.org.au
- Australian Government Department of Health. Better Access initiative [Internet]. [cited 2026 Sep 25]. health.gov.au
- PubMed search, 25 September 2026: hypnosis, hypnotherapy or self-hypnosis with grief, bereavement or mourning in title or abstract. 17 records; one randomised trial; no trial of a recording.
- Running time, sample and purchase count: the publisher’s product page, 25 September 2026.
Other pages that may fit better
- Grief and lossEvery grief session in one place, sorted by who or what you have lost
- Anticipatory griefIf your parent is still alive but fading, and the grieving has already started
- ForgivenessIf the relationship was hard, and the grief is tangled up with old hurt
Whatever you decide about the recording, do one thing this week: tell one person, plainly, that your mum or dad has died, and that you’d like to be asked about them.
Ernest McLeod — clinical hypnotherapist. An Adelaide practice, seeing clients across Australia by video. Fourteen years in practice.
- ICHP
- FELLOW, ASCH
- IICT MEMBER
With grief I would rather send you to a GP too early than too late, so the doctor appears here more often than the recording. More →
Twenty-six minutes, a sample first, and ninety days
If you want a regular, quiet time that asks nothing of you, and the sample suits you, this is a small place for it.
US$18.95Instant download · 90-day refund · about A$27 · opens in a new tab
Results vary from person to person, and hypnosis does not replace medical care or treatment. This is a self-help audio session, not a diagnosis or a substitute for professional care. If you have thoughts of not wanting to be here, call Lifeline on 13 11 14 or the Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467; in immediate danger, call 000. Griefline (1300 845 745) is a support line, not a crisis line. Never listen while driving.